On a plane

I just put my family on the plane to go back home. I did a pretty good job of holding things in. I always seem to cry the most when Lindsay leaves in times like these. She's the one person in my life who knew my parents in a way that is deep enough to feel the same loss I am feeling. I want so much to hold her and for her to want to hold me so that we could make each other feel better. She let me hug her but didn't hug be back. That's an improvement over when my mother died. I wonder what is going on in her mind. I know how glad my father was to see her. She's his "punky brester". He has such fond memories of her childhood - taking her out for a grilled cheese and ice cream at Cliffside, just hanging out.
It was wonderful to have them all here this weekend. I stayed at the hotel with them so it was nice to have a break from my Dad's house at night. He seemed better this weekend - maybe that WAS because Lindsay is magic.
Tomorrow is another day. We have a blood test and the doctor. I think my Dad will still have a transfusion tomorrow, but he might decide not to. I respect his decision either way except with me leaving for the day on Wednesday I hope he has one. He will feel better for a few days with some new "red cells". We are going to have Hospice come in a talk to us on Tuesday. They may be able to provide a volunteer for the day or at least part of the day on Wednesday.
The deal seems to be moving along but it is really hard to juggle that with everything else that is going on. At the end of the day if I don't get the deal it won't be the end of the world. Family is much more important than any amount of money or deal in the world. Always keep things in perspective.